It's been tough

Last week was a bad week. I don't even know where to start.

...

Marcus is very big on his schedule when it comes to sleeping, I've mentioned this before. There were a couple days last week where his routine was broken. Sabe's been regularly coming home in time to help put the kids to bed so he puts Marcus down since he doesn't get to see him at all during the day. Well there were a few days that he either didn't get home in time or had to stay over night so I had to put him down. When I put him down, I've got Jamesen with me. Jamie doesn't like when you sit. So instead of sitting with Marcus and rubbing his back and snuggling, I'm standing up pacing with Jamesen and Marcus isn't laying down and trying to sleep because he's use to snuggling.

When Marcus' sleep schedule is broken, he doesn't sleep. And the less he sleeps, the less he sleeps. Seems backwards I know, but if he doesn't nap, he doesn't sleep well during the night which means he doesn't nap the next day, etc. So the combination of me putting him to bed and him falling asleep getting pushed back because his schedule was broken etc etc just REALLY made him cranky. Add that he's getting his last set of molars [still...................] and he's been a beast! Usually the thing to remedy this is to take him outside. But of course, pouring buckets. Finally when it stopped raining after a like a day and a half of him doing everything he knows he's not supposed to and being super fussy and clingy and all that jazz, I took him outside to splash in puddles. He was still fussy when we got back in so we went back out after nap time and he was even worse when we got back in again.

I wanted to rip my hair out. Jamesen has also been really fussy. I honestly thing that he might be getting a tooth but I'm not sure. He won't let me sit, he won't eat, he won't sleep. It's been exhausting. I have to stand and rock him back and forth all day every day to get him to stay asleep. Lucky for me, the boys have been passing out from exhaustion at the same time every day so I get a break at least.

It got so bad for awhile there that I had tried everything to calm them both down at the same time and when nothing had worked and I had nothing left under my sleeves, I just sat there and cried with them. Sabe was actually a bit worried about me for awhile there. He got the day off on Sunday and even though he hybernated most of the day, he kept Marcus upstairs with him for his nap and Jamesen I guess was so exhausted that he slept the entire time too and I just scrapped. I got like 3 and a half hours of scrapping done and then my neighbor and I took the babies [we both have toddlers and babies] to Walmart and just walked around grocery shopping. She's been pretty stressed too so we both had a nice time walking around and talking and not dealing with the crazy 2 year olds.

I've been staying up till like 2 am just calming myself down. It's hard to go to sleep after having an extremely aggrivating day, day after day. I've gotten tons of scrapping done in my down time though, so that's good.

Today was better. Daddy was home to put Marcus down yesterday and naptime was on time today so it went more smoothly. Plus it was sunny so we were able to go the park.

Being a mommy is hard work. I'm not gonna lie, there have been plenty of times that I wish that I wasn't a mommy just for a day. It's a good thing their so dang cute at the end of the day when they're sleeping and peaceful.

Something Blue

In the original, Marcus had a huge bruise on his forehead from running towards me and face planting. I'm pretty proud of this photoshop job and it's my entry for this week's Blue contest at I Heart Faces.

I need a pumpkin... or 4

I know I said in an earlier blog that it was starting to feel like fall, but now it's official! We went out in the back this morning and it was crisp and cool and the wind was chilly. We were all wearing long sleeves, leaves were blowing through the air and the smell... it just smells like fall. And I kept thinking to myself, "The only thing that would make this perfect, is if I had a few pumpkins chilling by my door."

Can you picture

How you would feel if your son or daughter needed a bone marrow transplant?
Now think of how you would feel if they couldn't find a match...



How devastated would you be? You could save a life. Join me in registering to be a bone marrow doner at BE THE MATCH . It could be your kid someday.

FAQS—

Isn’t it PAINFUL to donate marrow??

According to the National Marrow Registry, “General or regional anesthesia is always used for this procedure. Donors feel no needle injections and no pain during the marrow donation process. You can expect to feel some soreness in your lower back for a few days or longer.” Think you can handle that?

WHY should I donate?

You could very well be the only person on the registry of MILLIONS who is a match. According to the Puget Sound Blood Center, “There is a critical need for more volunteer donors. Many patients, especially people of color, cannot find a compatible donor among those on the Registry. A large, ethnically diverse group of prospective donors will give more patients a chance for survival.” Every single person who signs up is giving hope.

Is it easy to register?

After filling out your online registration with Be the Match you’ll receive a test kit. Simply take a couple swab samples from inside your cheek and send it back to them. It took me less than ten minutes to register online and five minutes to send the swabs back.

Who Pays?

Donors never pay for donating and are never paid to donate.

What if I can’t or don’t want to donate, but I’d still like help?

Volunteer. Make a contribution. Pray.

If I register is it certain I will be called to donate?

Nope. I wish it was that easy. You may never be called or your might be one of a number of potential matches. I’m hoping for the latter.

Is it safe to donate if I have kids?

Yes. Absolutely. Your body replaces donated marrow with four to six weeks! Isn’t that amazing? The average donor is back to feeling normal within a week of the their procedure.

Again with the losing sleep

I'm up again because of stalker friend. She's emailed me again and I was dumb enough to read and respond *sigh* I wish some new drama would hurry and take my place in her life because I'm sick of her stupid contradicting hypocritical emails. I don't know if she knows about this blog since I think I've hid it pretty well, but I wouldn't put it past her to search for me on blogger. I'm sure if she does know about this blog I'll get a nasty email about it. It's a good thing she's blocked and all her emails go to my spam bin. I forget to look in there. I wouldn't have even noticed her recent email had I not been waiting for an email from someone else and was looking in there just in case. I was quite surprised to see that email in fact.

That being said, Sabe told me my Christmas present, lol!! He's going to get me a Canon Rebel Xsi. I'm pretty excited about it. There's a lot that goes into a DSLR though, a lot more than just a point and shoot camera. With a point and shoot you can buy a regular memory card and most just use AA batteries. DSLR's have different batteries. You can buy just the body but then you have to buy a lense and you have to have a certain memory card as well. And to be honest, I'm not quite sure if the battery pack comes with the camera or not. When I first started looking at them tonight, I knew I had to get the body and also a lense and then all the sudden I realized I needed a new memeory card as well and who knows about the batteries! Good thing I've got my friend Kim though. She's a budding photographer [who I think is just amazing!] and is always good for information and advice. You might want to expect lots of emails once I get the thing Kim ;)

My mom has told me that Jared [her oldest baby] was sitting up by 3 months because he was such a screamer that he had awesome stomach muscles. Today I set Jamesen on the couch next to me and he lifted himself away from the back of the couch and sat for a few seconds before slowly falling foreward. He was trying so hard to keep himself upright. Marcus wasn't doing that until 4 months. Jamesen is only 2 and a half months! I kinda want to cry about this. I'm so picturing my future when he's two and Marcus is four and I take them to the store and turn around for two seconds and they're both gone. And I know this is a very real possibility because I got lost quite a few times as a kid. Of course, my mom had 6 others and Jake was worse than me about disappearing, so I don't hold it against her. Specially when I remember purposefully slipping away on one occasion. Basically, I'm in trouble and I know it and there's nothing I can do about it.

Man I'm so bummed. I hate drama. It just eats at me and makes me upset and angry and short tempered. I think I'm going to try and sleep even though I know I won't be able to. I'm going to be dead later today :(

completely candid

This week is completely candid and I think I've got the perfect shot :) Hope you don't mind Dorothy!

Falling for Autumn

Autumn is definitely upon us! We've been wearing long sleeves for the last couple of days. And I do have to say that the boys look so cute in long sleeves! Of course, they look cute in anything, but that's beside the point. The leaves are turning and falling and Marcus loves it. Last year during this time, we would go outside and spend hours hunting down leaves and listening to them crunch under our feet. Anywhere we went he would have to crunch the leaves and he would throw a huge fit if we didn't let him.

When we go to the park I don't normally let him walk because it's a bit of a far walk for a little person. He makes it all the way there and plays but gets tired about half way on the walk back and it's very hard to hold onto a two year old while you've got a 2 month old in the sling. Anyways, we walked yesterday and it was so cute to watch him going after all the leaves and jumping all over them. He was grabbing as many leaves as his little hands would let him.



Until he found a stick. Nothing's better than a good long stick that you can drag along the ground behind you!

While Lynne was here, we went shopping for fall clothes for the boys. They really did need the clothes so it was fun to just get what they needed and not worry about Sabe getting mad at me for frivolous purchases. I can't help buying stuff for my boys! I'd much rather buy for them than for me! I went to buy some booties for Jamesen because he's going to need something more than just socks to keep his feet warm. Have I mentioned how long his feet are?? I'd already had some newborn booties that were far from fitting him so I grabbed a 0-6 month size and they weren't even close either! So I put a 6-12 month size up next to his foot and his feet are barely small enough to fit in them. I bought them anyways. It's really funny to see his feet in them. They barely fit the length but his feet are so skinny that they kind just slip off him if he doesn't have socks on.

I'm trying to figure out the manual mode on my camera. As you all know, I'm planning on being a photographer some time in the future so I might as well get going. I'm having a few issues with it, but for the most part it's going all right. Here's a few of my recent pictures in manual.



My friend is going to let me take maternity pics of her and then some newborn pics of her baby later on. She's only just finding out what she's having in the next few weeks so it's going to be a while, but I hope to have my Rebel by then. We'll see!

Also!! A big step int he right direction for talking with Marcus. He's started doing animal sounds. They're signs, but he does sounds with them and he'll mimic the sounds you say. I'm so excited about this! It's been coming slowly, but I'm excited that he's going to be talking soon. Today would be a nice day for a talking Marcus. He keeps crying and I don't know what he wants, lol! So yes, we're celebrating this next step in Marcus' speech! Great job little man! He does elephant, cow, dog, snake, lion, duck and a monkey. That's all I can think of. Here's a quick VID.

I have a feeling that Jamesen will be sitting very soon. If he's leaning up against the couch he can hold himself rather than falling to either side. I put him in the bebe pod today while I did dishes and he sat perfectly in it and just cooed and smiled at me. He's got such a sweet personality when he's not screaming. The smiles, giggles and coos more than make up for him screaming! We're definitely blessed to have him in our lives!

Marcus is starting to think so more and more as well. I got this picture. This was when I was having some issue with manual mode. I think I can fix it in photoshop but I've not tried yet. I'll work on it when I go to scrap it.


Thanks for reading :)