Little boys and little sisters

Marcus and Jamesen adore Gemma.

 Marcus begs me to hold her constantly.

 She gets smothered if I don't watch those two boys like a hawk!

 She sure is loved by everyone around.

 The boys coming running in the morning when they wake up, ready to snuggle her.

 I was so afraid I was going to get PPD, but their attitudes towards her and their excitement that she has here is helping me make it through.

 She's such a blessing to us.

  We're so thankful to have her.

 My sweet G girl.

Introducing Miss Gemma Nichole!

She arrived fashionably late, but quicker than quick! It was extremely intense and crazy! If you want to read about it, you can do so here.

So far she's doing great. We got home today after a little more than 24 hours in the hospital. She's a bit jaundiced, but we expected it so we're just keeping an eye on her. She'll have her levels tested again tomorrow afternoon to make sure things are going down. She's nursing fantastically though, so I'm not too worried about it.

The boys just adore her. I'm excited that Jamesen is taking so well to her. He's not jealous at all, but wants to climb into my lap too and just stroke her face. It's so adorable! Marcus is constantly asking to hold her and wants to help change her diapers and such. They're being so cute with her and I feel so blessed at their reactions as it's a total 180 compared to Marcus' reaction when I brought Jamesen home.

Anyways, we're just hanging out and enjoying daddy's paternity leave at the moment. Missing Grandma terribly as she had to go home today (sad face). If you want to see more pics of Gemma, the link to my facebook album is here

Thanks for visiting! :)

Days away...

We're sitting just days away from my due date. I can't help but wonder what Gemma's going to be like. Is she going to be a typical child or are we going to have some developmental problems with her as well? If she IS a typical child, will I be able to handle it?

I've been thinking about this a lot lately. Jamesen has been passing Marcus up on some of things that Marcus can't do. When Marcus was two, he couldn't go and get his shoes when asked or grab a diaper/the wipes etc. Jamesen has been doing it lately and it's really putting into perspective how far behind Marcus is. Even now if I ask Marcus to get something, he has a hard time getting it. I have to point him to exactly where it is, he can't look for it himself. Jamesen has no problem hunting an item out on his own. It's really hard to watch Jamesen do these things that Marcus can't do and not get upset. Don't get me wrong, I'm so proud of Jamesen, but he really puts Marcus and his delays into perspective. It's hard to see your child be so far behind their peers of he same age.

I'm wondering if Gemma will be completely typical. I've got a friend who's got a little girl about 9 months younger than Jamesen that's completely typical. We spend a lot of time over there and sometimes it's really hard to see her just be herself because she just turned two and Marcus barely speaks better than she does. We don't spend all day every day with her though and for the most part, I can forget how far ahead of where Marcus was at that age she is. If Gemma is completely typical, I'll have that all day every day as a reminder. Not that I want her to NOT be typical, though. I'd rather her not have to struggle the way her brothers will have to to catch up. *sigh*

I really don't know why I'm worrying about this right now. I guess I'm just having a hard time since my hormones are so high and I'm so close to my due date. Maybe I'll feel better after she's here and I fall in love with her sweet face because as of now, she's just an idea to me, not a reality. Not until I see her and hold her will I really know life with her.

On top of all of that, the fact that I'm worrying about these things scares me. I had similar thoughts before I had Jamesen and I ended up having PPD really bad. I don't want to get that again. It was bad. At least I know what to look for now since I've already been through it and at least my boys have each other. I find some comfort in that. If I end up having PPD like I did before, at least they'll have each other to keep company and all that since I won't be very good with the whole social aspect during that time.

Anyways, if you got this far, thanks for reading. I just needed somewhere to write my feelings down.